


MJ, Soap, & Oats

by Tamatoa_SHINee



Category: SHINee
Genre: First Love, Friendship, High School, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, M/M, Mild Language, OT5
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-27
Updated: 2018-11-28
Packaged: 2019-08-30 02:59:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 13,517
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16756561
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tamatoa_SHINee/pseuds/Tamatoa_SHINee
Summary: You know what sucks?  Being 17.  You know what else sucks?  Being in high school.Jonghyun is a few months into his senior year of high school and he's juggling a lot. He is accumulating a lot of stress.   Stress from applying to colleges, overbearing parents, maintaining high grades, trying to maintain a social life, hiding his true aspirations, hiding his sexuality, and falling in love.  In order to deal with all of this, he gets by with a little help from his friends ;)





	1. Part I: Everyone

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so I've never done this before.  I've never written ff.. actually! I've never written anything aside from horrible school essays, but Jongyu has inspired so many ideas for me.  I thought of simply recommending prompts to others but I know in order for it to truly be how I'd like, i'd have to do it myself *sigh*
> 
> The real-life Jongyu friendship is so beautiful that one can't help but put them in various scenarios of L O V E :3

     You know what sucks?  Being seventeen.  You know what else sucks?  Being in high school.  Being expected, by your parents, to be a straight A student when you are naturally -at best- a straight B student.  You know what REALLY sucks?  Being all three PLUS hiding the fact that no! you don't want to be a lawyer like dad and No! you don't want to marry a beautiful, complacent woman like your mom.  In fact, you want to travel and do music, whether producing, writing, or performing it.  Since you're in high school, you aren't really thinking about marriage, but when you do it only makes you sad seeing how even though it's legal, it's not very accepted marrying the same sex.  So, yeah.. life sucks, but you know what's there to make it all seem not so loud?  Weed ;)

    That's the thought that goes through Jonghyun's head as he's on his bi-weekly visit to his dealer.  It's dark out and the park is quiet.  He takes a left and nears the bundle of trees that have become quite familiar to him this past year.  His dealer is leaning against one of them seemingly playing a racing game on his phone based on how he's twisting and turning it.  As he nears the man looks up and taps the screen of his device a few times before pocketing it.

    "Sup Hyung."

    "Hey Kid.  How are you?"

    "Stressed.  My parents are still on my case about college.  They think that because my final grades last year had two B's that it's doomed me from getting into the college they went to."

    "Been there."

    "Yeah, except you were the perfect student and got into the college of your dreams with a scholarship so I'm pretty sure your parents backed off of you."

    "Hmm.  That's very true.  Welp, sucks for you.  You got the cash?"

    "Wow, thanks a lot Jinki-hyung.  It's nice to know you care enough to listen to my problems."  Jonghyun said dripping with sarcasm.

    "Hey!  I asked 'how are you' didn't I?  It's just not very smart to have a drug deal at a family park."

    "It's not very smart to sell drugs in the first place."  He quipped.

    "It's not very smart to smoke them either."  They both stared at each other until they both burst out laughing. "Here's your stuff."

    "Here's your payment, it's always a pleasure hyung."  Jonghyun put the little bag in the hidden pocket of his satchel.

    "No problem kid, get back safely."

    "You too."  He slowly turned and started to walk off only to be caught by Jinki's voice.

    "Oh and Jjong.. Try not to look like you're hiding illegal paraphernalia while you do so."  He said while laughing.

Jonghyun released the tight grip he had on the strap of his bag and uncurled his shoulders to try a more natural-looking stance. "Better?"

    "Much."

\---

    When Jonghyun reached home he was lucky enough that no one was in the living room, giving him a straight shot for the stairs leading to the second story.  He leaves his shoes in his cubby by the entrance and shoots towards upstairs.

    "Sweetie, is that you?"  Great. Not even half-way.

    "H-hey mom.  What's up?"

    "How was you study session?"  She said while leaning against the archway separating the living room from the kitchen

    "Same as always."

    "Your plate's in the microwave, would you like me to heat it up?"

    "Yeah, I'll be back down, lemme go change."

    "Alright sweetheart."  Mrs. Kim gave him a small smile, which he reflected, as she turned back into the kitchen.

    Jonghyun rushed upstairs into his room, locking the door behind him.  The first thing he did was put his phone on the charger.  Then he went over to his closet, grabbed the stool from the far corner and placed it in the center, stepping on it in order to reach the box labelled 'MeMoRiEs' sitting on the top shelf.  Bringing it down he placed it on the floor, opening it and taking out his One Piece lunchbox from the 5th grade.  Jonghyun grabbed the small bag out of his satchel and opened the lunchbox, its insides containing a lighter, matches, rolling papers, and seeds and stems left over from his last bag.  He opened the baggie and dumped the dark green plants into the lunch box.  He pulled off one of the rolling papers and started to roll a blunt.

    "oOoOh ho ho, you're going to be so good for me aren't you?" He whispered while licking the blunt paper closed. "Of course, you are, Jinx always had the beeest weed.  Shit, just what I needed.  But, alas.. I have to save you for later, yes I do."  Okay, maybe the baby-talk was a little much, but Jonghyun is a weirdo like that AND he has had a lot of stress.. in his defense.

He placed the rolled up joint in the lunchbox, then that into the cardboard box, then that back on top of his closet, scooting the stool back into its designated corner.

    Jonghyun made his way over to his dresser and pulled out his clothes for his shower/smoke later.  Then he takes off his blazer and hangs it on the back of his computer chair at his desk.  The next to come off are his socks, slacks, and button-up, leaving him in his t-shirt and boxers.  Walking over to his bed, he puts on the basketball shorts he had waiting there and then grabs his discarded clothes and tosses them in the hamper by his door on his way out.

\---

 

    The hot water pouring down on him contrasted with the cold breeze coming in from the open window in the bathroom.  Jonghyun sat in the tub, leaning towards the opening in the shower curtain.  Between his fingers was the joint from earlier.  He already felt calmer and it wasn't even halfway gone, Jinki really did have the best weed.  He puts it out on the edge of the tub and reaches up, up, uuup to place the blunt on the window sill.  Now that the smoke part it done, he can close the curtain all the way and fully emerge under the falling water.  This is his favorite part.  A time to just relax and wash off all the dirt and stress accumulated throughout the day, perhaps even tweak some of the compositions he's been secretly working on.  This is his free-time to create, think, or not think at all.  

    Tonight, however, it seems his brain wants to think a lot.  The first thing that comes to mind is the mini-argument he had with his mother just an hour ago while he was trying to enjoy his dinner.

 

        "I know it's only 2 months in, but how are the grades looking?  You know you have to start applying early, you don't want to miss your chance."

        "Mom, my grades are fine."  She makes a face at the word 'fine', probably thinking how she would've preferred his grades to be 'great' or 'fantastic', " and I have been applying.  I've already applied to several," music/art (he adds in his head), "schools."

        "Korea University law school included?"

        "Mom, you know I don't really.. have an interest in [law, he added in his head again] t- that school."

        "You're father and I-"

        "Mom-"

        "No, Jonghyun! You're-"

        "No mom.  I'm applying okay?  You should be happy for any school I can get into.  It's hard trying to stay at the top of my class just to please you guys and look good for a school I have no interest in.  I get good grades, I don't go out, I do my chores, I do everything you want me to.  I just want to be a good son and one day get a good job, so please be happy with any school I choose."

    He looked at his mom, pleading with his eyes.  She looked down and when her eyes me his again, they were more distant.  "We will continue this discussion when your father gets home."

    Jonghyun stood up, took his plate and put it in the fridge before pushing his chair back in and heading upstairs.  He didn't say a word to his mother nor did he look at her, afraid to see the blankness in her eyes again.

 

    That was about and hour ago.  Jonghyun shook his head trying to think of something else as he rinsed the conditioner out of his hair.  By this time he was standing in the shower and had already finished washing his body from head to toe.  After turning the water off, he stepped out onto the water-absorbing rug and pushed his hair back.  When he caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror he chuckled at how his hair reminded him of Jinki's, minus the part on left of course.  Great.  Now he was thinking about the subject that comes second to only his thoughts of music during his "shower 'n chill" time.  Yes, Jonghyun had a bit, just a bit of a huge/major crush on his drug dealer.  His DRUG DEALER for crying out loud.  But once again in his defense, if you take out that 'small' detail, Jinki was only two years older than him, a straight A college student -like how??- he was co- captain of the swim team, part of the Environmental Club, a doting son, a sympathetic; yet playful; older brother, AND he was H O T.  Hot as HELL!  Jonghyun sighed.  The things he could do to that man.  You know, if he weren't still an inexperienced, demure, underage, high school.. boy.  Jonghyun sighed again.

    When he opened the door of his private bathroom adjacent to his bedroom, Jonghyun thanked the heavens that Jinki had distracted him enough so that it was the FIRST time he'd ever forgotten his blunt on the window sill.  Because when he opened the door with his towel wrapped around his waist, on his bed.. waiting, was his father.

    "D- Dad?!  What are you doing in here?"

    "I heard about the argument you had with your mother."

    "Dad, it was hardly an argument."

    "So you're not 'interested' in KU Law school?"

    "Dad."

    "Do you know how many connections I've left open in order for it to be a straight shot for you?  Do you know how many times I've brought up my 'bright son' to members of the school board?  Everyone in the family practically knows that you'll be going to the same school your mother and I attended.  Why the disinterest?  If you want to go into law, why not that school?  Are you trying to do some sort of last minute teenage defiance?"

    "No, dad.  I just, never saw myself going there."  Jonghyun said quietly.  And I don't want to go into law, he added in his head, again.

    "Well, I never saw myself having an insolent son, yet here he is trying to embarrass me."  Mr. Kim said as he stood up off Jonghyun's bed.  The action made Jonghyun take a step back bringing him into the warm bathroom once again.  "Apply to that school Jonghyun, we'll be waiting for your results."  He stared at Jonghyun as he made his way out the room, stopping at the door as if expecting something.  

    Jonghyun knew just what his father was waiting to hear. "Yes sir."  He replyed, throat tight as his father nodded and left, shutting the door behind him.  Jonghyun released his tight grip on his towel and walked over to his pajamas on his bed, now wrinkled from being sat on.  He put them on and walked over to his bathroom to grab the blunt and turn off the light.  He did the whole 'closet-stool-box-lunch box-reverse' process when he put the blunt away, lying down on his bed.  Jonghyun's hair was still wet, but he didn't care.  What was wet hair compared to being the biggest coward in the world?  It truly sucked being seventeen, struggling to maintain HIGH grades, to be forced to go to a school he didn't want, it sucked.  It sucked wanting to write, compose, wanting to sing.  But what sucked most of all, was not being able to tell anyone, it sucked being a coward.   
That's why when his sister knocked on his door later that night, he chose silently crying to himself over letting her in on what was troubling him.  He couldn't chance her telling his parents, not that she was the type, but like he said, he was a coward.

 

\--- 

 

    "Oh my dear, dear boy.  Look, women are... like handbags."

    "What?-" Taemin said confused, whiled Minho and Jonghyun laughed at Kibum's ramblings.

    "They are all different.  In size and shape.  Some can be handled, but some have to be treated delicately."

    "Key.. Key are you high?"

    "Listen!  You came to me with girl problems and I'm tapping into my vast knowledge in order to help you out."

    "No, I sat at the table and said that 'today sucked ass'."

    "Yeah, while you were looking like a kicked puppy staring at Naeun."

    "I was not!"

    "Yeah, you kind of were." Minho added.  "You guys have a fight or something?" He said while stuffing his face.  All four were sitting at their unofficial, yet official lunch table.

    "Shut up!  We're not even dating!"

    "Yet." Jonghyun added.

    "Oh, you shut up too.  You know nothing of girls."  Taemin said making the other two laugh as Jonghyun looked offended.

    "Uhm, excuuse me.  I had a girlfriend!"

    "In the 3rd grade."  Kibum said emotionlessly.

    "Sorry not everyone can be a man-whore like you." He said making Kibum scoff. "And it's still one more girlfriend than Taemin."  Minho laughed.  "And Minho." 

    "Hey!  My parents don't allow me to date okay?  If they did, Key would have some competition as the most eligible bachelor in school."

    "Oh please, Minho.  Even if you could date, you'd be no match for me.  You know you actually have to TALK to girls right?  Converse with them?  Yeah.  I don't see any of you being anything like me."

    "Thank God." Taemin wiped his brow while suppressing a smirk.  When he looked at Kibum he was met with squinted eyes.  "Sorry."

      
    Jonghyun watched as Kibum started to give Taemin more (unwanted) advice and Minho secretly listened in while stuffing his face.  Jonghyun was the only one of his friends who was a Senior.  He had to soak this all in, no matter how annoying or uninteresting it got.  It was already October and soon he'd be off to college away from his buddies.  His friend for the longest was sitting across from him.  Minho was a Junior and him and Jonghyun had met in elementary.  On Jjong's first day of 6th grade, someone caught himself trying to make fun of his height and when he turned towards his locker ignoring them the bully slammed him into it.  Jjong turned around ready for his first fight, parents be damned, he saw his bully slowly backing away from a MUCH bigger kid.  Jonghyun assumed the stranger must've been from the middle school across the street based on how quickly his bully had retreated.  When the stranger turned around Jonghyun was surprised to be met with the most baby-faced person he'd ever seen.

    "What the heck kind of look did you give that kid to have him run away like that?"

    "I don't know.  I just saw him being mean and I knew I had to stop it.  Do you need me to walk you to your class?"

    "What? No!  I'm okay.  I'm not scared of that dweeb trust me.  I do need help finding my class though."

    "Oh okay, the 3rd and 4th grade wing is to the left."

    "Th- third?!  Now you're being mean!  I'll have you know I'm in the 6th grade buddy."

    "Sixth!  Whoa, you're my hyung then!"  He said while quickly bowing. "I'm sorry for my rudeness, I assumed you were younger than me!"

    Jonghyun stared at the boy bent in half, it was awkward because he'd never been treated this way.  He could get use to this.  "It's alright.. kid.  No harm no foul.  How about you show me the 5th and 6th grade wing and we'll call it even." He said as the straightened Minho to his full height. 

    Minho gave Jonghyun the biggest smile he'd ever seen, "Okay, hyung."  From then on, names were said, parents introduced, and sleepovers had.  They've been best friends ever since.

    Jonghyun met Kibum in middle school.  By this time Jjong was in the 8th grade and Minho had come to him complaining about how this boy in his grade cursed him out because Minho told him he had to clean up.  Minho was on the football team and Kibum joined the team as the water boy hoping to skip the workout portion of athletics.  He got what he wanted only he assumed that all he had to do was give out towels and pass out water when needed.  So when Minho handed over a sack full of sweaty jerseys, Kibum did what he does best.  He flipped out.

    "You should've heard what he said!  I've never heard anything like it! I can't even repeat it.  Something about how I'm crazy and poked the Jade Emperors anus?? What?!  Plus he won't call it 'football'! He keeps saying SOCCER!  He said he was raised in America and that's how they say it.  I can't stand him."

    "Breathe Minho, breathe."

    "I'm just tired hyung.  You know how I am.  When he didn't want to wash the jerseys I ended up taking them home and washing them.  Since our apartment complex doesn't allow private washers and dryers I had to use the shared one on the first floor!  I ended up washing for hours until my mom got home and helped and by then I'd already used up some of the money I've been saving for a gift for mothers day.  I'm just so frustrated."  Minho huffed and looked away when his vision started to get blurry.  He was already irritated that he was talking about this and wasting the only time he go to spend with his hyung anymore, he didn't want to embarrass himself by crying in front of him or anyone else in the lunch courtyard.  

    Seeing his best friend like this sparked a feeling Jonghyun hadn't felt before.  Sure, he'd been mad, but now he was furious.  The next day he informed his tutor he'd be a little late to their session.  He waited in the field next to the school, watching the boys kicking and running the ball back and forth.  He didn't need to ask to know that the particular boy he was looking for was the one sitting off to the side filing his nails, looked the least amount interested in the practice.  A hour later when practice was dying down, Jjong heard the coach tell Minho to inform Kibum of his duties and proceeded to follow the other players into the gym.  Minho hadn't noticed Jonghyun and went straight to Kibum.

    "Kibum."

    "What?"

    "I'll help bring the water in but you'll have to get the cones off the field and any stray balls we might have missed."

    "Why am I doing this alone again?  There are twenty-something players and I'M stuck being the maid.  And you?! You're going to "help bring the water in"?"

    "You're lucky he's nice enough to even offer!"  They both turned to look at who said this.

    Minho's "Hyung!" was said at the same time as Kibum's "Excuse me?!"

    "You heard me.  Minho is the nicest person in this dirty world and I don't appreciate how you're talking to him.  YOU wanted this position so YOU need to deal with the responsibilities. Not Him!  He works his butt off, off and on that field and he's the last person who needs anything extra on his plate!  So I'm walking away and I'm taking him with me!  He's going to shower off and head home and YOU are going to get the 'soccer' balls and cones off the field."  Jonghyun grabbed Minho by the arm and started to march him towards the gymnasium.  He stopped in his tracks and turned to add, "and you're bringing the water too!"  He turned back around missing the surprised look on Kibum's face, one that resembled the expression on Minho's.  From then on out, Kibum started to do his job and he even apologized to Minho.  Minho being the big old care bear he is immediately forgave him and even invited him to lunch with them.  Jjong and Key quickly became friends after that.

 

    "Hellooo.  Earth to Kim Jonghyun."  Key waved his hands in front of Jjong.

    "Sorry, I was just daydreaming."

    "Whyy, you got a new crush?" he teased.

    "I don't have an old one"

    "Ooh, hyung is there someone you like?" Minho asked excitedly.  He'd only heard of Jonghyun having one crush and that was years ago.

    "Um. No.  No thank you.  Every one in this school is as straight as a stick and even more boring."

    "I don't know about that hyung."  Taemin added. "My brother told me that once he told everyone about his bisexuality, everyone else started to come out.  They're not all straight... they're just hiding."

    "Well, they can stay hidden because they a little below my standards."

    "Oh please.  You're just too scared to tell anyone you're gay because word might reach your parents." Key said while he rolled his eyes.

    "Well that! And seriously everyone else is totally not my type.  The best looking guys in school are sitting at this table and you all suck!"

    "I'm pretty sure you're the only one that suc--" Jonghyun slapped Key in the back of the head.

    "Hey, don't forget that I'm your hyung.  I don't tolerate insolence." He waggled his finger at him in fake anger.

    "Yes sir!"  Key saluted.

    "Hyung I'm serious about what my brother said though.  He even dated two boys during high school."

    "Yeah, well Jinki-hyung is a lot more confident than I am. I'm not saying I think I'm ugly but I'm not ready to let anyone know that part of me yet."  
    "Of course, I understand."

    "I'm just glad I have you three.  I don't know what I'd do without my three best friends."

    "Probably smoke weed and cry 24/7."

    "You know what Key, I probably would."

    "But, Jonghyun-hyung.. isn't that what you do now?"  Minho said finally finishing up his meal.

    "Now that I think about it.. What the hell do I need you three for?  All you do is whine, argue, and beg me for help with schoolwork.  Fuck you guys."

    "Fuck you hyung."  Kibum responded laughing.

    "Yeah, fuck you hyung." Minho slapped Jonghyun on his arm.

    "Jjong-hyung, we're still cool right?  It's because of me you were introduced to weed anyway."  Taemin blinked cutely at Jonghyun.

    "Okay Taem, we're friends, but only because the weed."

    "And because I'm cute."

    "And because you're cute." He laughed.  It was actually kind of true.  Last year when Jjong was a Junior and Minho and Key both sophomores, they were his only friends.  Jonghyun was content with that despite his ever growing loneliness.  The number of friends one has doesn't trump the quality of friends and Minho and Kibum were both grade A friends.  When he happened across a lost looking freshman roaming the halls he quickly offered his help so that he could be on his way.  What he didn't intend on seeing was the most beautiful person, male or female, he'd ever seen.  Jonghyun was a sensitive soul and believed he'd never see someone more stunning than his sister.

    "Sorry Sodam." He whispered to himself.

    "What?"

    "I asked if you needed any help?"

    "Oh, I'm looking for my homeroom.  I went to use the restroom and kind of forgot my way back."

    "Schools been in session for 2 weeks, did you just transfer?"

    "No I've been here for 2 weeks."

    "Oh."

    "Yeah."

    That strange encounter, and others like it, occurred several times before Jonghyun had successfully showed Taemin every nook and cranny of their high school.  By that time he was already introduced to the sophomores of the bunch and Jonghyun felt a little more whole.

 

\---

 

    The boys, minus Minho, once again met up at Taemin's house after school for their almost daily 'study session', Taemin had almost every game system and the biggest T.V..

    Jonghyun read the notification from his phone.  "Guys, Minho said to start everything without him, the coach is making them stay late."

    Kibum rolled his eyes.  "Is he gonna make it tonight?"

    "I don't know, he just said go ahead."

    "I'm so glad I quit soccer in junior high."

    "You were never on the team, waterboy."

    "Hey, I carried my weight.  Do you know how many muddy shirts and musty jock straps I had to wash?!"

    "I don't want to know-"

    "Too Many!"

    The three continued laughing and joking around until Jonghyun excused himself and headed towards the bathroom.  On his way back he passed the familiar dark mahogany door.  Jinki-hyung's room.  He'd been in there several times last year but he didn't go in now, without the man present it just didn't feel right.  

    When Jonghyun returned to the living room he asked Taemin, "How come you didn't take Jinki-hyung's room when he went off to college?"

    "Well as you know he stayed at home his freshman year, he only got his apartment near his school this summer.  His room is bigger and has a better view, but we've lived in this house most of our lives and it wouldn't feel right taking it even though he did offer it to me.  Plus when he comes over from time-to-time he likes to relax there so.."

    "Yeah I get it.  It's just I'm pretty sure if Sodam had moved out when she went to college, I would've taken her room as soon as she got her acceptance letter.  Older siblings always get the best room."

    "And only children." Kibum added with a satisfied smile.

    "Oh shut up.  Even if you had a sibling, you'd still have a nice-ass room you spoiled bastard."  

    Kibum stood up after a few knocks on the door sounded. "I smell jealousy."  He opened the door thinking it was either Minho or the pizza they had ordered.  "Nope, I take it back.  I smell sweat." 

    "Shut up Bummie.  I'm wet because I rinsed off before heading over."  Minho responded as he toed off his shoes near the front door.

    "Well you didn't 'rinse' well enough you still stink."

    Minho grabbed Kibum from behind effectively putting him in a choke-hold.  "Well now we're the same."

    "Ugh! You garbage can of a human being!" Key screeched making the other three laugh.  The four of them couldn't have been more different, yet they also couldn't have been more perfect for one another.

 

\---

 

    That night Jonghyun didn't need a smoke with his shower.  School wasn't so bad.  He had managed to FINALLY fix a part of his newest song that had been bugging him for weeks.  His kids weren't THAT annoying today, although that screech from Kibum did give him a wild headache.  When he came home, his dinner was in the microwave and his parents had gone to bed early.  Today was a good day, which meant his thoughts as he laid in bed were nothing but peaceful.  And what did Jjong think about when his mind was content?  Why the love of his lif-- his wonderful hyung/weed dealer.

    Jonghyun never failed to conjure up a perfect image of Jinki within milliseconds, starting with that wide smile.  That gorgeous, shining smile.  Jonghyun remembers the day he met his hyung.  In fact, it was sort of a milestone in his life.  When saw that smile for the first time is was like everything clicked into place.  At 16 he was able to realize why he didn't and couldn't date another girl after Hei-Ran in the third grade.  He was able to understand why he never found girls as attractive as his friends seemed to and why his eyes would always linger on a handsome stranger in public longer than what would be deemed appropriate.  When Jonghyun met Jinki, he became whole because seeing this beautiful man made Jonghyun see and accept his whole self.  He was gay.

 

\---

 

From: Jinx ^▼^  
To: Me  
    Hey, I can't make it to the park tonight, you can stop by my place instead.  Plus I need to ask you something in person.  I'll text you the address.

 

 

 

 

A/N: Soooo, how was the first part.. This is a one shot btw.  I thought I'd write like 2k and I'd be done... well I'm almost 5k and there are still 2 more parts XD  I suuuuck


	2. Part II: Someone Else

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More Jongyu leads to a new character

From: Jinx ^▼^  
To: Me  
    Hey, I can't make it to the park tonight, you can stop by my place instead.  Plus I need to ask you something in person.  I'll text you the address.

\--- 

    When Jonghyun arrived at Jinki's apartment his heart was beating so fast he's pretty sure it was visible from the outside.  The apartment number '204' was staring him in the face and yet he couldn't bring himself to knock.  This was it.  He was finally going to see where Jinki has been living for the past few months.    
    "Just knock goodness!" He whispered to himself.  "What so hard? Just c'mon! Now... okay now.  For real this time, ok-"  
    "Jjongie?" crap.  
    Jonghyun slowly turned away from the door to face an amused Jinki carrying what looked to be his mail. "Sup hyung."  
    "Why are you whispering to yourself outside my door?"  
    "I was trying to remember the lyrics to the song I thought of on the way here.  It was in my head and now it's.. not.?."  
    "Oh, I'm sorry dude.  I know how focused you need to be when it comes to your compositions."  Wow, he bought it.  
    "It's not your fault," Jjong said as Jinki passed him in order to unlock his apartment.  He opened it and stepped aside to let Jonghyun in, "it was probably crap anyway."  
    "Jjong, I've heard your songs, I think it's impossible for you to make 'crap' music."  It's a good thing Jinki's back was turned while he locked the door and said this because the expression on Jonghyun's face would have been a dead giveaway to how he felt towards the older man.  
    "Thanks Jinki-Hyung." Jonghyun said as he looked down.  "That means a lot."  
    "I'm serious too.  You have to know how honored I am to have heard your songs.  I just wish you were confident in your talent enough to share it with others."  
    "Actually, I showed Minho a few.  After six years together I guess he's finally chipped away at the ice in my heart."  He joked as Jinki led him over to the couch.  
    "Hold that thought, I'll be right back."  Jinki walked into a small hallway disappearing through the door on its right.  This gave Jonghyun a little time to look around.  He was currently sitting on a brown leather sofa.  That seemed to be the main color scheme of the living room area.  The apartment wasn't very large but was by no means small.  The living room ran into the kitchen area with only a bar acting as a barrier.  No walls, just wood floors blending into tile to accentuate a change in rooms.  Looking towards the hallway Jinki disappeared to, there were 3 doors.  He assumed the one open was Jinki's room, which meant the other two consisted of Jinki's roommate's room and the bathroom.  Jjong had never met Jinki's roommate, but from what he'd heard from Taemin, Jin was a pretty decent guy.  The apartment all in all was very plain.  It looked like a catalogue picture, nothing out of place.  Not very spectacular, but it was comfortable, warm, and Jinki's.  Jonghyun had to hide his blush at that last thought as Jinki finally returned to sit next to him on the couch.  "Okay Kim, here you go.  It's $80 this time."  
    "What?!  It's usually half that!"  
    "Actually I overprice my merch all the time, I just give you a deal because you're my dongsaeng."  
    "Okayy, so what's changed now? Do you see me as a hyung or something?!"  Jonghyun said trying to lighten the situation.  It seemed to work seeing as Jinki chuckled and shook his head.   
    "I'm just screwing with you kid, I do need a favor though."  Jonghyun let out a hard sigh.  He'd quit smoking before he spent $80 on some weed.  Do you know how many SNACKS?-  
    "Oh yeah, the thing you wanted to ask me.  What is it?"  He asked as he handed over his usual $35 to Jinki.  
    "So Homecoming is coming up at your school and I don't know if your aware of this but I have a cousin who is a freshman and I'd really appreciate it if you took her."  
    "Whaaat?  Hyung I don't know."  
    "Did you already have a date?"  
    "No I was going to go with Minho and we were going to try and get Taemin and Naeun together that night."  
    "Great.  I don't see how taking her would put a fork in your plans then."  
    "Hyung why can't you take her?"  
    "Jonghyun.  Are you serious?  She's a freshman, do you know how embarrassing it would be to have everyone know your cousin took you to the dance?  They'd probably think of it as some pity date."  
    "Isn't that what.. you're kind of asking me to do?? Kind of??"  
    "No.  For one, you're not her cousin and for two," he put up two fingers, "I expect you two to have a wonderful time.  I know the both of you quite well and I think you'd hit it off."  
    "Well you obviously don't know me that well."  He said causing Jinki to squint his eyes at him.  "What I mean to say is you know how uncomfortable I am around new people. I become a total dork.  So how the hell do you expect me to be Prince Charming and parade a girl I barely know around a dance in front of a lot of people who I honestly care nothing for?"  
    "I'm not asking you to take her to the middle of the dance floor and propose.  She's a little introverted as well, the only friend she has at school is Taemin, but she and I agreed that this is something she could participate in to get her out of her shell.  I don't need you to act like you're in love with her, just take her with you guys and make sure she has fun."  Jinki scooted closer to Jonghyun causing the latter to look up at him in surprise by the close proximity.  His eyes widened even more when Jinki placed his hand on his neck bringing him to eyelevel, "Jjongie.  I rarely ask anything of you.  I practically give my weed away to you.  I've only known you for a year and yet I consider one of my closest acquaintances.  Hell," he squeezed his hand that was resting on Jonghyun's nape, "I actually sort of think of you as a friend.  So.. buddy.  What do you say?  Will you be a nice guy and take my baby cousin to the dance?"    
    How. the. Hell. could Jonghyun say no to him now when Jinki was this close to his face with a smile dripping in sweetness and eyes full of mirth. "O- okay hyung."  Jonghyun said quietly, he felt like he was in a daze.  Jinki looked so beautiful as his features changed to a look of satisfaction. His hand felt so warm as it slid down Jjong's shoulder.  Jjong actually cried internally when Jinki let go and scooted away.  
    "You're awesome, thanks Jjong."  
    "No problem hyung.  Who is your cousin anyway? I don't think Taemin ever mentioned having one."  
    "That little brat.  He told me he takes her everywhere!  I'm going to kick his ass."  Jinki said to himself before looking up and adding, "her name is Eunsook."  
    "Eun.. BOOKIE SOOKIE?"  
    "Is that a nickname.. how cut-"  
    "She's your cousin?"  
    "Yeah?"  Jinki looked up at him confused.  "Is that a problem?"  He asked a little defensively.  
    "Uhh, no. It's just.  Well, I've never seen her before but everyone.  Well I've heard people say things I guess."  
    ".. What kind of things?"  
    Uh oh.  Jinki may have asked his question carefully but Jonghyun could tell by his suddenly stiff stance that he was preparing to get pissed off.  "I heard people talk about how she's a, and don't hit me I didn't say it, they just call her a complete weirdo.  They say she wont talk to or look at anyone.  Some girls say she eats her lunch in the bathroom stalls.  I heard she was mute and the kids at my school make fun of her for being in special ed."  
    "She's not in any special education program and she's not fucking mute."  
    "Hey, hyung. I never met her. I never spread any of these rumors.  I didn't know she was you and Taemin's cousin.  That's just what I've heard around the school about 'Bookie Sookie'.  It's just stupid, petty rumors.  The kids at the school are boring and bored so they've go nothing better to do than pick on the easiest target to them."  Jonghyun had looked away when he saw how angry his words were making Jinki, but when he heard no reply he had no choice but to look back at him.  He could feel his heart break a little when he looked at his hyung.  He'd never seen Jinki cry, he wasn't now but his watery eyes gave away that he was trying to keep himself from doing so. "hyung?"  
    "Her parents passed away when she was too little to remember them, Eunsook lives with our grandparents.  She's never shown any side of her that didn't scream happiness.  At home when she's in her element, when she's relaxed..  I guess that's the only side of her I see.  I had no idea she was treated like this at school, she never let it be known.  Taemin sure as hell never said anything about it..  I guess she's just trying to be strong for her family but, she's only 14 and she shouldn't be shouldering so much."  
    "Hyung, maybe they don't bully her to her face." Jonghyun stopped talking when Jinki scoffed.  
    "Is it so bad that my grandparents might have to move her to a different school?"  
    "I don't know."  
    "I don't understand.  I came out as bisexual in the 11th grade and no one ever tried to bully me."  
    " 'Cause they know you'd kick their ass then give THEM detention." Jonghyun quickly shook his head when his attempt to get Jinki to laugh failed, 'of course now isn't the right time idiot' he said to himself.  "I'll take her to the dance hyung, but I'd like to get to know her first okay?  See that wonderful side of her that you do."  
    Jinki finally looked at Jonghyun after he said that, causing Jjong's heart to speed up when a flashed him a small smile.  "You're a good kid."  
    For some reason that made Jonghyun feel upset, yet his cheeks and the tips of his ears still turned pink.  "Thanks hyung.  I guess I'll head out now.  My parents like me to be home before 10.  I can't wait to turn 18 just so I can walk in at 10:30 just out of spite."  This made Jinki laugh out loud and Jonghyun felt very proud of himself.  
    "Ooh, what a sinful child."  
    "The evilest."  Jinki got up with Jonghyun and walked him to the door.  After Jjong put on his shoes, Jinki grabbed his shoulders from behind and squeezed them.    
    Jjong couldn't see the expression on his hyung's face but he listened intently when Jinki said, "Just so you are aware Jjongie, I was messing around with you with the whole 'you either pay me more or take out my cuz' thing."  
    "I know hyung."  
    "I was also teasing you about being an acquaintance.  You're a good friend. Actually.." He stepped closer and if Jjong didn't actively try to listen to him over the increasing sound of his heart beat he might have missed the words that made him scream into his pillow that night and fall asleep with the biggest smile on his face, "Since once upon a time I too chose my studies over my social life, when I met you -and we clicked- you immediately became my best friend.  I know you have Minho and I know I'm not the best role model because of my 'side job' but I'm glad you chose me to be close to you.  Being your hyung is one of my favorite things."  Jonghyun was afraid to turn around because of what his eyes might reveal when he looked at Jinki, but he knew that if he didn't see Jinki's face after saying those words he'd regret it.  
    Jonghyun slowly turned around and Jinki's hands dropped from his shoulders.  "I'm your best friend?"  He said in a quiet voice that made Jinki chuckle.  
    "Yeah, don't get all emotional kid.  I meant it in a 'you're my favorite friend' kind of way." He reached up and tugged at Jonghyun's right cheek, "Night Jjongie.  Be safe on your way home."  
    "g'nigh hyungh," After Jinki laughed at how his response came out Jonghyun slapped his hand off of his cheek and glared at his hyung as he walked out the door, however, as soon as the door closed and he knew Jinki could no longer see him his face broke out into a grin and he practically sprinted home.

\---

    Woah!  She had the same round face like Jinki! And- and her nose was all round and button-y like Taemin's!  What the heck!  There's no doubt that this girl sitting on the floor between the bookshelves in the fantasy section of the library was Booki-- Lee Eunsook.  
    "Eunsook-ssi?" He whispered, so to not startle the girl. Yeah, It didn't really work.  
    "Jonghyun-ssi?!"  
    "Shh shh! we're in a library!"  He whispered loudly. "Wait, you know who I am?"  
    "Yes, you're my cousin Taemin's friend."  
    "Oh yeah." He sat down a few feet from her.  "So I talked to Jinki-hyung and I've decided that I would love it if you came with me and my friends to Homecoming."  He had no choice but to mirror her expression of shock when he saw it on her face.  Was he not supposed to mention that Jinki asked him? Crap.  
    "What?!  Jinki-hyung said he had a friend that could take me, I- I had no idea he meant you."  Eunsook continued to blush to hard, Santa would probably hit her up come Christmas time. "Wow, I mean.. Do you know what you look like?"  
    Okay, gone was the shy girl.  "I'm sorry?"  Jonghyun wasn't sure how she meant this.  Was his ego supposed to inflate or was he supposed to be offended?  
    "You're freaking gorgeous Kim Jonghyun and.. and you're going to take ME? to the dance?!"  
    "Shh," he laughed, "we're still in the library and you're not so bad yourself."  Big mistake.  Jjong was sure that if he touched her cheek right now he'd scald his hand.  
    "T- thank you. wow. why. wow." She looked back down to her book.  While her eyes were still glued to it she turned her head as if to add something else but quickly snapped back and started to read.  Jjong didn't know if he should feel relieved or kind of sad that Taemin wasn't the only quirky/weirdo in the family.  "Thank you Jonghyun-ssi.  I know that you didn't have to do this and outside of my home, I'm not really good at talking to people.  I don't know how you were convinced, but I really want this, so.. thank you."  
    He takes it back, she's not weird like Taemin, she's sweet like Jinki.  "You're welcome Eunsook-ssi."


	3. Part II 1/2: Homecoming

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The group @ homecoming.  
> The start of new couples?

A/N:  This is just what occurred at the dance.  Warning: This chapter doesn't have Jinki in it (ik, so sad).  Sorry for the inconsistent updates, school gets in the way.

 

 

 

 

"Aww. I'm gunna cry." Key turned and wrapped his arms around his date, burying his face in her neck.    
    "Key-Oppa, stop being so dramatic." Arisa laughed playfully trying to shove him away.

    "You don't understand Ari-chan, look at him. My SON.  He's over there talking to a girl he's been crushing on for two years!  He barely spoke a word to her during that time and now he's over there! Making her crack up!  I'm so proud. I'm so proud."  He rocked them back and forth with his arms around her while he faked cried.

    "Oppa, if you're going to do this we might as well move over to the dance floor." She whispered.  Arisa was still a little unsure of where they stood.  She knew Kibum had dated a lot of girls in the past, that was one of the first rumors she heard when she transferred to this school after her family moved from Japan.  Her Korean wasn't the best but she understood the word 'player'.  When she finally met the man himself it was too easy to forget all those rumors and fall hard.  To her, and she supposed many others, he was amazing.  He was sassy and cocky to anyone and everyone, but always to sweet to her.  Arisa finally decided that she didn't care if he tossed her aside after he was done with her -like he was rumored to do to every girl he dated- she just wanted a chance to be able to call him hers, even if only for a short while.  When he rejected her saying she'd 'become to important' to him to compromise their friendship, she was both crushed and relieved.  So for months they've been hanging out, she even went on a trip with him and his family this past summer.  Any hope she had for a romantic relationship was long buried, that was of course until he asked her to be his date for Homecoming.  Yes, he did say if she'd like to join him and his group of friends, but to Arisa it meant so much more

    Key smiled at her and pulled her towards the dance floor, "Of course my dear, I gotta show you my electric moves."

    How could she not laugh along with him when he flashed her a smile showing off his dimples, a smile that never failed to give her butterflies, "Please don't."

    "Ohh, Ari-Chan.. I'm gunna make you eat your words."

 

\---    

 

    Eunsook watched as Arisa and Kibum giggled and swayed to the music.  The song was way more upbeat than the tempo they were dancing at, but it looked like they were enjoying themselves so all was well.  The sight made her sigh happily.

    "Do you want to dance?"  Jonghyun must've took her exhale as a sign she was bored.

    "Oh nono no.  I'm okay.  I actually am enjoying watching everyone."

    "Okayy." Jjong said not too convinced, but he didn't want to push her to do anything she wasn't ready to do.

    "Honestly, I'm enjoying myself.  Thank you for this.  I'm definitely going to tell Jinki-Oppa how amazing you've been to me."

    "Aahh, I don't think I- need that.  Thanks"

    "Jonghyun-ssi.  I think it's just what you need."  Jonghyun became even more confused at the sly look she was giving him.

    "What do you mean?"

    "I watch people.. a LOT.  It's one of my favorite pastimes and I've noticed that teeny-tiny smile and how flustered you get whenever someone mentions my cousin."  Now he found himself thinking how that knowing look Eunsook gave him diminished her sweetness, Greatly.

    "For your information, my 'not so sweet anymore' date."  He said while smiling at the face she made trying to hold in her laughter, "I think of Taemin as the little brother I never had and by that I mean I want to Constantly punch him in his chubby little face."

    That last statement did it, Eunsook couldn't hold in her laughter anymore.  Jonghyun joined her soon after.  They both knew she wasn't referring to Taemin when she touched on Jjong's crush but he supposed she was going to let him slide or maybe she didn't want to reveal his secret as his bestfriend, Minho, was currently approaching the pair.  The two became quiet which in turn may have made Minho feel a bit awkward.

    "Hyung.  Eunsook-ssi." He nodded to each. "You guys look like your having fun."

    "Yeah, until you joined."

    "What?!"

    "I'm sitting here trying to enjoy my date and here you come."

    "No! We all came together!  But Key and Ari are together and Taemin summoned all his courage to chase Naeun, so that leaves us three!  So technically I'm your date too!"  Minho had started the statement off with fake-fury but by the end he couldn't hold in his giggles.

    "You're my date too?!"

    "Yeah!"

    "So I'm your date too?" He said through his laughter.

    "Mm Hm!"

    "So Eunsook is your date too?"

    "Ye--"  Minho's eyes widened in shock but then he cleared his throat, "Yes."

    Eunsook was too busy looking down trying to hold her blush so she may have missed the slight panicked expression on the taller boys face, but Jonghyun didn't.  How interesting.  "I'm going to go get us some drinks.  Eunsook, I'll get you another lemonade, Min?"

    "I- I'm okay Hyung.  I have my water at our table, I was on my way there anyway."

    "Perfect, take Eunsook with you."  There it was again, Jjong had to suppress his smirk.  That brief look full of panic, this time on both their faces.  This was too funny.  

    Jjong watch as Minho turned towards Eunsook slightly and pointed his arm as if moving out of the way so she could lead.  Jonghyun made his way over to the beverage tables as he contemplated what just occurred.  It had only been about two weeks since Jjong had asked Eunsook to homecoming and in that time he and Taemin introduced her to the other two.  Much like when Key introduced Arisa to the others, everyone was overly polite but after knowing them for long enough she was treated just as rudely as they treated each other.  That's what friends do, they talk shit to one another.  However, in this case, when Eunsook got more comfortable around Jonghyun and Key, she stayed polite with Minho and he did the same.  How did Jjong never notice this?!  They like-?  No, they are almost 2 years apart..-'Jinki is a little more that 2 years older than you'-he was rudely interrupted by a little voice in his head.

    "Oh shut up." He said aloud making the teacher guarding the drinks look at him weirdly. "..sHut Up, they have my,, favorite flavor of POP here.  Wow.  shut up."  He grabbed the lemonade and his 'favorite flavored pop' and walked away awkwardly.  'pop' really who the hell said 'pop' anymore?    
As he stewed in embarrassment, a brief blotch of vibrant blue caught his attention.  Naeun looked stunning in her homecoming dress.  What made her even more beautiful was the sweet contented expression on her face as she swayed slightly to the music.  She was such a sight in fact, she almost out shown the beauty who was currently swaying along with her (almost).  Even after meeting the love of his li-- Jinki-hyung, Jonghyun still firmly believed in terms of looks, Lee Taemin had no equal.  At this very moment with his arms shyly draped around his crush, Jjong couldn't help but think the Lee family had crazy good genes.  Speaking of.. his attention averted towards the pair he abandoned not even 7 minutes ago.  When he left he hoped Eunsook would be able to see more of Minho's charisma if in fact that was the reason she was blushing.  It looked like his plan worked because she was currently covering her face with both hand suppressing her laughter as the boy seated next to her made the weirdest faces.  'Please tell me my best friend in this world isn't showing my future cousin-in-law aegyo' he thought to himself.  'I'm not ready to deal with that right now'  

    Jonghyun shook his head.  The drinks in his hands were freezing, but he really wasn't ready to see Minho's aegyo.. again.  Jjong looked across the room for another distraction as he waited out the disaster occurring at his groups table for the night.  He spotted Key and Arisa and-- Oh my goooosh..  Jonghyun thought back to what Key told him the other night when Jjong cornered him asking him about Kibum's intentions with Ari-chan after hearing he asked her to the dance. 

 

        "I'm asking her like you asked Taemin's cousin.. 'as a friend'."

        "Kibum.  You told me she had feelings for you."

        "She confessed a long time ago and I told her we were better off friends."

        "But I've known you long enough to see you have feelings for her too!"

        Kibum visibly deflated, "I didn't when she asked me.  I always liked her and I truly thought we'd be better off not dating, but it was like as soon as she asked it opened my eyes and ever since then I've been falling deeper.  I've tried to date around, but I can never go any further.  I'm screwed."

        "What if she still likes you?"

        "That was a long time ago hyung." Kibum shrugged, "Plus, I still think she's too.. pure for me.  She such an angel.  As much as I would love to be with her.  I would hate myself for corrupting her."

        "So just be miserable then. right?"  Jonghyun felt sadness and anger towards the younger.

        "Right."  Kibum said snippily causing Jonghyun to shake his head and walk away.

      
    So what the hell changed?!  Kibum and Arisa were currently maintaining the strongest eye-contact Jonghyun had ever seen.  They were so engrossed with one another they were barely even swaying to the music.  Arisa had one arm on Kibum's waist and the other wrapped around his back holding on to his shoulder.  Kibum's hands were even more intimate with one on the small of Ari's back and the other softly caressing her cheek.  The couple looked like they were in the middle of their first dance at their wedding! and Arisa's white dress and Kibum's matching white blazer didn't make it any better.  

    "Is this allowed!"  He said out loud again.  He was fuming because Key should've taken his advice sooner, but he was also so excited because of how well the two fit.  He looked at his friends again.  The pairs, all so different but all so cute.  He happily sighed, "Aah, young love." He turned back around towards the beverage table- figuring the ice in his drinks had melted- and his eye's met with the teacher on guard.  The same teacher who had heard him speak to himself.  The same teacher who was most likely looking at him weird because he spoke to himself out loud.. again.. just now.  "Melted ice is fine, so.. bye."  He said to the teacher evoking an even more weirded-out stare.  Jjong closed his eyes and slowly turned towards what he hoped was the direction of his table before stalking off.  He was so glad he was graduating this year.

 

 

 

 

 

A/N:  The next part is the last part.  Ty for anyone who's read this.  I just wanted to try my hand at writing because I have so many ideas.  


	4. Part III: Just You & Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Final <3 Jongyu Fighting!

A/N:  LAST PART!! Thank you to all the viewers.  I only have two subscribers but that just means I only have to split my love two ways lol.  But seriously, idk what i'm doing, so thanks for coming this far!  I hope you enjoy it.. It's too long lol

 

 

    Jonghyun looked away.  He couldn't handle the gaze Jinki was giving him, it was too much.  
    "W-what?"  
    "Sookie told me everything."  
    "What?  Everything?  What do you mean?"  Eunsook knows about his feelings toward Jinki, she couldn't possible have-  
    "She said she had one of the best nights of her life last week."  
    "O-oh.  I'm glad.  Yeah, I tried to show her a good time."  
    "You're awesome Jjongie.  With what you told me, about her being a loner at school, I'm glad she was able to enjoy herself, even if it was one night."  
    "Oh no hyung.  She's a part of our crew now if she likes it or not.  We'll never stop bugging her now even though she prefers to be alone."  Jjong and Jinki shared a look, both recalling a conversation had in the latter's room months ago. 'Guess it runs in the family.' Jonghyun thought.  
    "I know, I talked to Taemin.  I was really going to give it to him for abandoning our only cousin.  It turns out whenever he tried to talk to her at school she brushed him off saying she wanted to go to the library.  According to him the rumor about her eating in the bathroom is false and Eunsook is well aware of the nasty words said about her.. she just really doesn't care.  She's my tough little girl."  He said proudly which made Jonghyun laugh.  
    "You're talking like she's your daughter."  
    "Nope, just my princess."  
    "Hyung! Stop being weird."   
    

    The two continued to joke around.  Jjong ended up coming over to Jinki's again tonight.  It was so much more practical this way.  
    "Why didn't we always do the 'exchange' here hyung?"    
    Jinki laughed, "Well, after I moved out of my parents place, we couldn't meet up there anymore and I forgot to give you my new address.  When you called for your weed I suggested the park only because it was close to your house, not because I planned on meeting there every. single. time."  
    "How was I supposed to know that, I thought we were trying to be inconspicuous."  
    "Jjongie, you do know that by being suspicious, one tends to LOOK suspicious?"  He said while chuckling, "Honestly I thought I'd humor you and your 'secret exchange' play."  
    "You're so not funny.  Aren't you a little scared you'll get caught?"   
    "Not scared, but I'm very cautious.  I only sell to those I know and only then to a select few.  I also don't let them recommend me to others."  
    "Well every time I walk home I'm SO scared."  
    "That's why I tell you EVERY time to act natural."  
    "It's not funny hyung.  If I found another way to calm my nerves I'd quit."  
    "Good for you kid.  Go for it, Honestly I've saved up enough money over these past 3 years.  I've been thinking about stopping as well."  
    "REally?  Where will I get my weed from?"  
    Jinki laughed, "If it came down to it, I'd get my guy to give me just a little to keep you happy.  You don't smoke that much anyway so I would save So much money."  
    "No, if you stop.  I'll stop."  
    "Jonghyun.. When you phrase it like that it makes me feel like I've been peer pressuring you this whole time."  
    "No," he poked Jinki in the chest, "just the first time we met."  
    "Oh no no, that was Gwen!  I just sat back and watched."  
    "Yeah, just sat back and let your girlfriend put a blunt in my mouth and make me smoke."  
    "I don't recall a gun being pressed against your head."  
    "Well I was 16 and a bunch of 'adults' were staring at me expectantly.. what'd you expect me to do?"  
    "Honestly, I thought you'd run out and go back with your friends."  
    "Well I didn't and here we are."  
    "Yeah, here we are."  
    "It's not funny, you and your friends corrupted me."  
    "Sucks for you."  
    "Sure does."  
    "Are you seriously going to quit, when I stop selling?"  
    "Yeah, even though I just thought of it now, I'll probably stop once I'm accepted into university.  That's the most stressful situation in my life right now.  My parents have been really pushing it.  Once I'm gone, I expect smooth sailing."  The wave he made with his hand caused a giggle to erupt from Jinki's smiling lips.  
    "Where are you planning on going?  I'll miss you if it's too far."  
    "Lucky for you KU Law is only 40 minutes away."  
    At the mention of that school Jinki's eyes squinted.  "... And the school you WANT to go to?"  
    "H- how?.."  Jonghyun looked down and quietly mumbled, "An hour and a half."  
    "Have you applied?"  
    "Yes, it was the first school I applied to."  
    "You know you have to go there Jjongie.  You'll never be happy if you choose your parents expectations over your dreams."  
    "I probably wont even be accepted.  My grades haven't been the best and I've already gotten a few rejection letters from other art schools.  One needed an audition and I don't have anything to show.  My songs are so mediocre, my voice is untrained, I-"  Jonghyun throat tightened preventing him from saying anything further.  Jinki scooted towards him and wiped the sole tear that fell from his eye.  Using the same hand he cupped the side of Jjong's face.  
    "Why don't you believe in yourself kid? You're the most talented person I know."  
    "Hyung you don't understand, I feel like everything is getting out of my hands and I'm still trying to fix it.  I feel bad for leaving my friends so I hope Eunsook can fill that void, but I feel selfish because I don't want to be replaced.  My parents want me to go to the worst school, the total OPPOSITE of what I want to do.  I want to sing, I want to write, produce, ANYTHING involving music and ANYTHING not LAW!  No school I want to go to has sent an acceptance letter, everyone else is getting their letters!  Where are mine?"  Jonghyun's words were starting to become rushed and his breathing erratic, Jinki moved both of his hands to Jjong's shoulders hoping to calm him. "I- I thought if I got an letter from a good Art college it would help my parents see that I am making the right choice, but if that doesn't work and I end up going to KU then at least I'm getting away from them!  I might be miserable for a while but I could always transfer later on right?  Wrong! Because I haven't even got a letter from the school I hate!  No one wants me and it's probably all because I didn't have enough extracurriculars or it's because of that B I got last year."  
    Jinki's hands slide off Jonghyun's shoulders as he huffed out a small laugh, "Jjongie, don't be ridiculous.  One B is not going to be your downfall, and as I recall.. you took ENOUGH extracurricular courses.  Some schools take a while to process their paperwork.  As for Eunsook being a replacement.  You said it yourself, she's a part of the crew now, but Jonghyun.. no one can replace you.  Relax kid, relax.  It almost over, just a few months and it's break time.  THEN, you'll being attending the college of your dreams an hour and a half awaaay." He reinforced the end of his statement by recreating the arm wave Jjong did not too long ago.    
    "But hyung-"  
    "No 'but's', just listening.  Listening to your wise hyung.  Stop giving yourself gray hairs.  You are almost an adult, you're going to live YOUR life.  Your parents already had their say, for 18 years!  I'm throwing a party this weekend.  You have no choice! but to come.  It's your time now, you need to live for you."  
    "That's easy for you to say, you never went against your parents."  
    "Jonghyun, I sold illegal drugs out of their house for 2 years.  I've held parties at our home when they went on business trips since I was 15 years old.  We're a Catholic family and I'm an open Bisexual. AND They caught me in their bed losing my virginity!  To the neighbor!  My mom's book club friend!"  
    "Hyung!"  
    "What?  She was hot okay?  Don't worry, she wasn't that much older than me."  
    "Oh my gosh."  
    "Just eight years."  
    "OH MY GOSH!"  
    "See, so you can't say I never went against my parents.  They're just okay because I say 'please and thank you', 'yes sir and yes ma'am', and I've always been amazing in school."  
    "You're a terrible person."  Jonghyun laughed at loud and Jinki joined him.  
    "The evilest."   
    "You still don't have a plan for the future hyung?  You're just living day by day?"  
    "I told you before Jjongie, I just want to be comfortable-"  
    "'And alone.'  Yes, I remember.  How could I forget?"

    After Jonghyun dried himself off and laid in bed that night, he couldn't help but think about that phrase again.  Jinki made everything seem so simple sometimes.  'I just want to be comfortable and alone'.  The first time Jonghyun ever heard that was the last time him and Jinki hung out in Jinki's childhood room.    
    It was sometime last year and Jonghyun had told his parents he was going to Taemin's house to study, when actuality he was going to hang with his older friends and smoke.  When he was told by Jinki to come in he found him laying on his bed sideways with his feet propped on the wall.  
    "Lock the door behind you if you plan on smoking."  
    Doing just that Jonghyun walked over to Jinki's desk.  He crouched down unlatching the key from underneath the swiveling chair to unlock the drawer of the desk and take out the tray.  "Where are Gwen and Yang-Hyuk?"  
    "I'm not sure."  Jinki said while eyeing him upside down.  
    "That's odd, I thought they were attached at your hip."  
    "Ha ha.  No funny story.  I kind of broke up with them."  
    "What?!  Are you okay."  Even though this could probably be the best news Jjong had ever heard.  
    "Yeah, well it was my idea that we got together anyway.  They both liked me and I wasn't that interested after breaking it off with my last boyfriend.  They were both really sweet though and I didn't want to be so direct, so I joked that I could go out with both of them.  Yeahhh, they weren't exactly opposed to the idea, hence our polygamous relationship came about."  
    "I don't understand how you live life."  
    "Sometimes I don't either kiddo."  
    "But you grew to like them did you not?"  
    "Sort of, and it worked until a little while ago.  I guess I've had my eye on someone else and they probably noticed."  
    'Someone else'  Jinki likes 'someone else' Jonghyun tried his best not to visibly deflate.  He knew he didn't have a chance with his hyung, always being called 'kid' or 'kiddo' or the baby moniker, 'jjongie', but he'd like if he could hope for a little while and that Jinki could stay single for a bit.  "So you broke up because you l- like someone else."  
    "Not really 'like', I'm just interested it them.  And no, I ended my relationship because I started to notice something quiiiite interesting.  Do you want to know?"  Jinki turned on his side as Jjong sat on the end of his bed.  "Those two grew quite close in the time we've been together.  During our make-out sessions," TMI HYUNG!, "they'd always grow bashful when it was their turn with eachother.  At first it was kind of hot, but then I'll admit I felt a little uneasy."  
    "Because they were growing away from you?"  
    "No, because seeing them together, it just looked right.  When they'd turn to me and we'd continue.. I felt like I was getting in the way some how.  They never made me feel that way, but I could see that they wanted each other.  If I didn't break it off when I did, who knows how long they would have continued denying their feelings."  
    "But you're not hurt, are you hyung?"  
    "Of course not.  I mean I was a little bummed because we had fun together, but Yang texted me last week saying, 'thank you' and I feel better than when we were together.  Aah, I truly am an angel."  
    Jonghyun shook his head, is this truly the life of a college student?  No, Jinki is just irregular.. he must be.  "I wouldn't say that hyung."  Jonghyun felt relaxed talking to his hyung.  He grabbed the tray off his lap and put it back in the drawer locking it away.  
    "No smoke break today?"  
    "Nah, I don't feel like it, I just want to chill if that's okay with you.  I've got some thinking about my future I want to do."  
    "I just want to be comfortable and alone."  
    Jonghyun eyes widened, "Oh, sorry."  How stupid, of course if he wasn't going to smoke he had no reason to be here.  He made for the door but what interrupted by Jinki.  
    "Wait!  Where are you going?"  
    "You said you wanted to be alone."  
    "Nooo, if you leave me I'll be lonely."  He whined, annoyingly.  
    "I don't understand."  
    "I was talking about my future.  In the future I just want to be comfortable and alone.  Sorry if I made it seem like I was ordering you away."  Jinki laid back down on his side while Jjong took back his spot on the bed.  
    "So you want to be alone but not lonely??"  
    "Yes." He said matter-of-factly.  
    "Okay, you got me hyung.  Elaborate, because I'm completely lost."  
    "Well, right now.  We're in my room, with the door closed.  My parents are out of the house.  Taemin is probably stalking that girl.  We're alone, just us, and it's okay. right?"  Jonghyun felt dizzy at his hyung's tone.  With Jinki laying to his left, looking up at him and speaking softly, Jjong could do nothing but nod dumbly.  "Now once you leave, I might get a little down, but I'll still be okay and alone.  There have been times however when I doubt everything I've done.  Maybe I could be a better son or brother.  Maybe I'm not doing so well in school.  Maybe I'll get caught, arrested, and I'll deserve it all.  Moments when I feel hopeless and helpless, I could be surrounded by everyone who loves me but I'll be lonely.  I can feel like no one truly gets me.  Got me?"  The low tone to Jinki's voice completely changed to a comical one with those last two words, their volume startled Jonghyun out of the anxious mood he was getting into.  
    "I understand hyung."  
    "See you can be alone and lonely or neither or either.  Alone could be good or bad, but lonely is never good.. always bad.  For my future, I might get married but I don't want a lot of children.  I need my peace.  I don't want to live in the city.  I don't want a fast-paced job and I don't need the 'high life'.  I want to be comfortable.. and I want to be alone with my loved ones."  
    "Sounds nice."  
    "Riiiiight?"

As Jjong drifted off to sleep that night, his last thoughts were about how beautiful life would be if he too were comfortable and alone and only with his hyung.

\---

    "Um Stinki.. isn't that your kid over there about to be molested by Chan-ri?"  
    Jinki's head whipped from Yang-Hyuk to where his ex was pointing to.  He hadn't let Taemin come so there was only one other of his 'boys' that could be here.  "Fuck."  He handed his drink to Yang and politely excused himself from the girl he was talking to before heading over to the most wasted person at this party.  "Hi, Chan-ri.  He's underage."  He grabbed a wobbly-Jonghyun from under her arms. "Yeah thanks."  He put Jonghyun's arm over his shoulder and supported most of his weight as he lead him to his bedroom.  
    "Wh-what?  Hey who?  Stop I wont be molested.."  
    "Jjongie, shut up.  It's me."  
    "Who's me?"  Jinki flipped the switch to turn on the light before kicking his door closed. "Oohh, Jinki! Jinki-hyungieee."  
    "Yep."  He softly plopped Jjong onto his bed and bent to take off his shoes.  He gently pushed his dongsaeng until he laid back on the bed.  Jinki pulled out his phone and dialed a number.  "Hey Taem.. call Jonghyun's parents and say he fell asleep and he's spending the night... I don't care just make them believe it... He's drunk. Like majorly!... No I wont take a video.... No I wont send a pic-... No, you can't come to the next one I already told you.. Ok. Okay.  Looove you... Did you hear me?.. Well then, Say it back.. awww bubby. Okay bye."  Jinki tossed his phone to the side and sat on the side of his bed.  He pushed some of Jjong's bangs away from his forehead.  That action caused Jjonghyun to slowly open his eyes.  "Ooh, Jjongie.. What am I going to do with you?"  
    "I'm not even.  I'm not that even.. Drunkk"  
    "Nice Korean.. I understood every word."  
    "Hyuuung."  
    "Jjooong.  I didn't know you couldn't hold your liquor.  You should have told me I wouldn't have let you drink like that, or at least I would have stayed by your side."  
    "I was not going to drink a lot.  It's just.. you knOW"  His expression turned sour and he directed his angered face at Jinki.  
    "What!"  
    "YOu! You jerk!  I hate you hyung.  Why can't you ever.."  
    "Jonghyun. Wha-"  
    "Was she really that funny or did you just want to screw her."  Jonghyun sat up against the headboard, his enraged state seemingly sobering him up.  "Who?"  
    "That girl attached to you all night.  Is she the one you're interested in?  She's not prettier that Gwen.  Nice downgrade."  
    "Stop being an asshole, this isn't like you."  Jinki warned.  
    "You don't know, I can only be your sweet little dongsaeng for so long.  I live a sheltered life and the only crazy things I've done have been for you!  I smoke a drug I could be arrested for.  I lie to my parents about hanging with you.  The two parties I've every been to have been yours! And I'm drunk for the f- first time in my life because you invited me here and ignored me the WHOLE night."  
    Jinki was startled at the tears he saw building in Jjong' eyes. "I didn't mean to ignore you.  I didn't mean for any of that."  
    "You never do. Just like you never noticed my feelings for you."  Jinki's eyes widened at that confession as the confessor slowly laid back down.  "I never told you, but I don't want to just get away from my parents and chase my dreams.. I wanna get away from you too hyungg."  The last word dragged as Jonghyun drifted off to sleep, not that it mattered seeing as his hyung couldn't form a word if he tried.

\---  
    "Oww."  The blinding sunlight shone through the window above him making it impossible to open his eyes.  "My heeead."  He whined as he tried to sit up.  Jjong attempted to open his eyes again.  "My eeeyes."  
    "Payback."  Jjong's head snapped in the direction of the voice, the sudden movement caused him to grab his head again because of the pain. "I purposely left the curtain open so you'd get a migraine."  
    "Jinki-hyung?  Why are you in my room and why are you getting payback?"  
    "You're in my room, you didn't go home last night.  and DONT worry, Taemin told your parents you're at our house.  Here's some water and pills for your pain."  Jjong mumbled a thank you as he downed the water and pills.  "You confessed your love for me last night."  
    Jonghyun spit out the remaining water in his mouth onto Jinki's shirt. "WHAT?!"  
    "It's okay.  No need to be embarrassed, I love you too, but I'm upset that our relationship started in such a shitty way."  
    "WAHT.  RE re- relati-??"  
    "Yeah, on the night you get shit-faced drunk because I was literally ONLY talking to someone, having me rescue you from a grabby old lady-"  
    "old-?"  
    "Well she's my senior but I feel like insulting her.  I don't like people touching what is mine.  Even if at that moment we weren't official."    
    "Hyung.  Please, I'm so lost."  Jinki stopped his pouting and looked at his soon-to-be-boyfriend (if everything went smoothly.)  He told Jjong to scoot and then proceeded to give him a play-by-play of last night.  By the time story-time was finished Jonghyun was as red as a tomato.  "god. no."  
    "I know, hell of a way to confess.  And don't use the lords name in vain."  
    "Jinki, I'm so sorry.  I don't hate you."  
    "But you want to get away from me."  He said seriously, Jjong silently stared into his hyung eyes.  He didn't know what to say.  He couldn't have been more upset and embarrassed, he'll never touch a drink agai-- wait... WAIT!--  
    "You LO- love me?"  
    Jinki looked down and grabbed Jjong's hand causing the latter to flinch, when he looked up again his face was less than a foot away.  They'd been closer before, but the tension was never so heavy.  "Yes, Kim Jonghyun.  I've liked you for a while, but I didn't know I loved you until you said it last night and I've had since then to think about how I feel and.. I feel the same.  I'm sorry I didn't see your feelings, but I've ALWAYS seen you.  Give me a chance and I'll make it right."  
    Jjong couldn't believe this was happening.  If not for the obnoxious pounding of his heart, he'd think he was still dreaming.  But he was awake and Jinki was saying this to him.  And it wasn't a lie, his hyung never lied to him. "How could I not.  I'd never let you be lonely."  He knew he chose the right words to say when his hyung's eyes showed a light he'd never seen before.  
    Nothing could be better than that look he was getting, well that is of course until Jinki leaned in and placed his lips on Jjong's.  He'd always thought Jinki's plump lips would feel just as soft as they looked, that was a severe understatement.  There couldn't be a better feeling than this.  Just as Jinki opened his lips, tilting his head just so for better access he was pushed away by a blushing Jonghyun with his hand on his mouth.  
    "Don't!"  His muffled words came through. "I probably smell like alcohol and morning breath."  
    "You're finee."  Jinki tried to lean in again, but was stopped by Jonghyun's other hand.  He pushed Jjong's hand to the side and lowered his head to Jjong's neck.  Cool air that caressed Jjong's skin as Jinki inhaled caused a slight shiver.  "You smell like berries."  He chuckled.  "I bet I'm worse."  He tilted his head inviting Jonghyun to smell him too.  
    Jinki was only able to see Jjong's eyes because of his hand blocking the bottom half of his face, but he only needed to see his eyes to observe how Jjong's expression changed from one of apprehension to one accepting a challenge.  Their eye contact remained intact as the younger slowly leaned down, it was broken once Jinki could no longer see past the side of his face.  He kept his cool as Jjongs' soft breath hit his skin.    
    Jjong snapped back up into his mouth-guarding position.  "You don't stink, you flirt.  You smell like soap.. and oatmeal?"  
    "That would be my body wash."   He chuckled.  "It's in the bathroom right through that door.  Feel free to help yourself to it as well as the spare toothbrush on the top shelf by the sink.  I'll have some clothes waiting for you when you're done."  Jjong quickly scurried off the bed, if he was going to flirt with his love, he needed to smell his best.  Before he crossed the threshold he was stopped by his hyung's voice. "Oh, and Jjongie.. Hurry up.  I've waited too long- I think we both have- and I really want to kiss you again."  The serious tone and dark eyes coming from Jinki caused Jonghyun to put an extra pep in his step.

    'Okay, cold shower it is.' he thought to himself.

 

 

A/N:  Um.. was that okay?  I really don't know anything lol.  Thanks you for reading.

P.S.  The other couples lived happily too and Jjong got into the school he wanted, parents be damned lol 

P.S.S.  If you want to go any further Jongyu got married and adopted 1 kid like 12 years later lol Idk

 

 

 

(P.S.S.S.  I'm in the process of writing more stories!  I told you they inspire me!  It's a whole disney inspired hoobaloo- A Tarzan Story and a Little Mermaid one so far  xD  I'm so excited.  Stay tuned!!!)


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